Saw a 5-inch red centipede trying to enter my house via the open garage door tonight, without thinking stomped on it, wearing flip flops. One end of the little freakazoid came up and wrapped right around my big toe. I leapt 9 feet in the air, wiggled my leg like it was on fire and made all sorts of movements with my arms that I really hope didn't get videotaped. It fell off. It didn't sting me- either because I'd squashed the stingy end or it was just laughing so hard at what an idiot I was. I made several shuddery sounds, flicked it into the bushes with my wife's shoe, and closed the garage. I really hate those things.
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